Snarky Girl

Today was not a banner day in Julie's world.

My 7 week old was a cranky pants for most of today.  He barely napped, cried ALOT - he just wasn't happy with anything I was doing.

My 2 cats decided that they would beat the living hell out of each other all day.  When I went downstairs to break up the ruckus, I saw both of them sitting on their back legs.  They were actually poised like boxers and pummeling each other in the head. I mean, really. 

We have ants.  I've attacked them in different areas of the house...but this morning was a doozy.  They were coming from the living room into the kitchen and straight to the cats' food dishes.  God, what a damn mess. 

The neighbors are NOISY.  We live in a cute little townhouse, so occasionally one can hear some knocking here and there.  But THESE folks...UGH!  They slam things - the front door, the cabinets, etc., and the sound comes through the walls.  I would almost rather hear them talking!  Completely and utterly ANNOYING.

Oh, and the piece de resistance?  I tried on a pair of my fat pants from 2 years ago.  Size 14.  I couldn't get them over my thighs.  Holy Mother of God, I went sideways...yes, it has only been 7 weeks since I had my son, but I've NEVER had a stomach like this...and my legs!   Attack of the Ripply Uni-thigh.  My upper arms look like my rotund grandmother's did when she was alive.   And my ass!!!  When did I get all this???

One of my best friends had a baby in March - the most beautiful little girl -  and she has some post-baby weight she wants to get rid of.  She talked about joining Weight Watchers online.  That does sound good...the idea of having to sit through meetings and try to make sense of it all when I don't get enough sleep doesn't thrill me.

BUT...I need accountability.  Oh, I know how I get...I was a good girl today, so I deserve a pizza/Ben & Jerry's Heath Bar Crunch/dark chocolate bar.  I need to have the threat incentive of weighing in each week to keep me on track...at least at first.  And, I won't devour an entire pint of ice cream if I'm going to be paying $10.00 per week.  The last thing I want to do is pay someone to GAIN weight. 

Oh, I am so glad this day is over and I'm hoping tomorrow will be better.

But I can only imagine where the next trail of ants will be.  I'll get those little buggers yet.

Visiting the Aunts...or, Why I Want a Drink NOW

Of course I won't...I'm breastfeeding. 

But you know what I mean - a double dirty martini with extra olives or a black cherry vodka and soda before the ensuing fiasco would take the edge off.

My family is nuts - but who doesn't have a weird family, right?  

My parents passed away almost 20 years ago and somehow, my dad's sister and brother's wife believe they have assumed the role of my mother.  Um, NO.   My mother was one of a kind and there is no replacement.  My uncle, God bless him, just wants to be my uncle.

Don't get me wrong, I love them.  But let's get organized around here.  I've had to gently explain to them:

1. They are not going to be my son's grandparents, and he will not be calling any of them grandma or grandpa.  They are Uncle and Aunts.  I don't even know WHERE that idea came from, but it had to be nipped in the bud ASAP.

2. I can't be the one to run over there every weekend anymore and clean ears and clip finger and toe nails.  If they need us, if there is an emergency of some kind, fine.  But there are other members in this family that are quite capable of helping out.

3. There is a reason why I don't call every day to chat about who died, who has gout or who ate what when.  Well, 2 reasons.  First - my head pounds like a jackhammer after one of those conversations.  The second reason?  HELLO!  Bobby, my 6 week old.  If I'm not mistaken, they were informed when I gave birth and are aware of his existence.  They've even met him.  If I'm not napping when he's napping, then I'm feeding him, playing with him or otherwise engaged by him.  I also have a house to clean and a new virtual assistant business I'm trying to get off the ground.

4.  I'm a grown woman with a husband, a house and a baby.  What is up with people?  I guess some folks have a hard time with change, especially the elderly...and especially those that don't see that I'm not a 5 year old that needs guidance.  I'm almost forty-freaking-one years old.

5. There is also my mother's side of the family to think about as well as my husband's family. 

Don't get me wrong - I love my aunts and I adore my uncle.  I grew up with them in my life...but I desperately need a break and some space.

And I sure could use that martooni. :)

xoxo

Cry Baby

That's me, not my son.  I want to make sure my son is healthy, happy and comfortable.  When I can't comfort him, or produce enough breast milk, or make him happy, my heart breaks. 

Bobby is now 5 weeks and 1 day old...and I am learning so much about this little man. 

During the first few weeks, he had ONE cry for all occasions.  Hungry, wet, poopy, gassy, mad, frustrated...you name it.  This cry sounds like a cross between a scream and when my cat sits outside the bedroom door, meowing as loud as possible. 

What does a new mother do when she doesn't have her own mother to turn to for help or advice? 

She calls the advice nurse at Kaiser like a stalker.  All of the nurses I've spoken with during the almost 20 times I've called have been so wonderful.   I have read SEVERAL books about newborns, caring for newborns, etc.  I can't remember anything, so each woman I spoke with gave me advice, told me when I should be concerned, and put my mind at ease.  The last nurse I spoke with - Today - made an appointment with the pediatrician on Monday because, as she said, "I understand what it is like to be a new mom and if this makes you feel better, let's do it."

I love her.

My little boy is waking up...it is time to feed him.  During the last 10 days, I have been hearing a slight difference in his cries.  The one I recognize best is the "I'm hungry right this minute" cry.  That one is NO JOKE and can seriously wake the neighbors.

But let me leave you with these:

  

Bobby at 1 week

Bobby 5 days ago during one of his meals.  He looks like a little old man!

xoxo

Here's Bobby!

Let me introduce you to the new man in my life:

Robert Arthur Comaduran IV!!

He was born on June 20, 2008 at 10:54am,  weighing in at 8 lbs 14 oz. and 22 1/2 inches long.

I am so in love with this little guy!!!

More later...he's awake and needs to eat!

xoxo

What's Your Function?

Oh, I had such grand plans for my maternity leave!  I was going to reorganize my filing, file the paperwork for my new business venture and clean our bedroom from wall to wall. 

Uh, yeah.  OK.

I've been super busy trolling You Tube for this:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkO87mkgcNo] 

and this:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEJL2Uuv-oQ]

and of course, this:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_TXJRZ4CFc]

I'm now on a mission to find anything that has to do with Electric Company.  Can you hear Rita Moreno yelling, "HEY YOU GUYS!!!!

Swollen ankles = bedrest = seriously, I need this child to be born.  

Hurry up, little man.  Mommy's waiting...and she's going to have quite the video repertoire to show you when you're here!

xoxo